I would love to say I have something interesting to report to all of you, but I don't. My life is as routine as ever and for the most part I appreciate this. I've been listening to a great book lately, "The Help". I have so enjoyed it. Even at work I find myself putting my head phones back in! This is not a good thing because I have a lot to get done.
I leave on my cruise in less than a month. I'm really excited and can't wait to spend time with Amy. I'm sure we will have tons of fun. How could we not have fun on a cruise. I'm leaving a few days early to head to FL and will be staying with Lindz. I'm excited to see her and her family!
I'm lucky to still have such great friends that have been in my life for what seems like forever.
I'm still uncertain about whether I will have a job or not come this fall but I perfectly calm about this. I have sent lots of applications in, online, and maybe something will work out. I've also applied to nursing school and need to complete my application for Vanderbilt.
Last night during scripture and prayer I became so agitated. Dad read the last verse of 2 Nephi. It states Nephi's attitude, I must obey. Then he said, if only we were like that, "I must obey". I sat right up out of my bed and said how are we not like that. Dad started naming things we didn't do and for everyone one he named I countered with something we did do. I get so frustrated when people make it sound impossible to be a good person.
Maybe I am so hard on myself because I feel like I'll never be good enough. And to me this stems from daddy constantly saying things like he did last night. So I'll never be spiritual enough. Then growing up my mom was obsessed with weight and low and behold, I'm obsessed now too. It probably has nothing to do with them but it might. I guess I shouldn't shift the blame.
2010 has started off even duller than I thought it would. I don't know how I got the notion life is suppose to be exciting but I think it should be. What should I do to liven it up? Please don't say date! I have no control over that and I have decided I am not in the mood this year. Relationships while they last are fun but they all end. And I'm not in the mood for another ending.
Anyways, besides boring, life is good. I'm getting a little better at playing the piano, not much but a little. I've started exercising again and doing my scripture study. I'm working on getting up that mountain.
3 comments:
Whoever said life was easy lied! I feel down on myself a ton too. I feel bad when I get a B or when I see everyone around having success in their lives and I feel like mine sucks. What can you do though? Just live your life to the fullest and hope one day all your dreams will come true. When you reach those ambitions, you'll just have more to worry you.
i really can not wait for our trip!!! it will be awesome!!!
You are going to have SO MUCH fun on your cruise! I can't wait to go on another - they're the best!
I was visit taught yesterday and the message was on self-reliance. The thing that struck me the most is that self-reliance, like the rest of the gospel, is on such a personal level...don't know if I can say this so it makes sense, but i'll try! So, we are accountable for what we are able to do. Perfection is not required, only doing the best we can with what we have at that point in time. There will almost always be things that we can't do without help from other people, but that doesn't mean we aren't self-reliant.
I think obedience is the same. We are expected to be obedient to the extent that we are able, but aren't gonna be exactly obedient in every commandment every single day...if we're just willing to try to improve as we go, I think that's what HF wants and expects.
You're a great example to me & so many other people...don't underestimate yourself! <3 Eve
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