a quick vent....that isn't quite so quick

1) I strongly dislike when people don't text me back. It's probably my number 1 pet peeve at this point in my life. It's not that hard! Just respond.
2) Just because you think your boyfriend is hot doesn't mean the rest of the world is trying to get on him. Some people flirt with everyone. Check it out before you jump to conclusions, if a girl is being friendly to your boyfriend, she is probably being friendly to most everyone. Especially if she told you before you started dating him that she would never date him. Besides most people when they are interested in someone actually becomes shy not flirty.
3) Even people who you consider your friends are judging you. They may say they see nothing wrong with your actions but they will hold it against you at a later date. People are naturally selfish and as long as it's not towards you it's okay but as soon as they see it as a personal threat. An email I received earlier kindly stated, "I thought you would never treat me like you did the other girls whose boyfriend you wanted but you are beginning to and I do not appreciate it." I didn't know I was the type of girl to go after other girls' bfriends. That's girls plural if you didn't catch on.
4) I think most things are better said over the phone or in person not through email. Blogging is also not a good way for the other person to find out how you feel. So either go private or talk to the person! It's not that hard. Refer to #3. Maybe she was saying it really nicely because she did say she loved me but non the less I'm not in love the idea.
5) I realized that depending on who you are around makes a huge difference in your attitude and how you treat others in the world. This summer I was more selfish than I had been at other points in my life. I didn't worry so much about others feelings but worried about me. I realized that and I'm trying to change it.
6) Just because you don't like people doesn't give you the right to be mean. We all have to suck it up on occasion and just smile and pretend to be happy about this. I know most are thinking maybe I'm not a good example of this, especially if you knew me this summer, but now that I am away from certain people (refer to #5) I realized I was wrong. I can pretend just like everyone else. It doesn't mean I have to be besties with everyone but I can be polite.
7) No point in getting mad at another girl because her bf is dating her and not you. Guess what, he chose to date her so get over it. If he would have thought ya'll would have been as perfect together as obviously you did then he would have asked you out. Maybe he doesn't find you attractive, maybe he doesn't think your fun, maybe he just doesn't like you but. Regardless, don't blame the girl and act like you and the guy can be best friends and the only thing standing in your way is her. Because it's YOU. He doesn't want YOU. And the sooner you realize this the quicker you can move on and find someone else.
8) How people perceive you might be just as important as who you actually are. Even if I don't see myself as the girl who goes after other girls bf, if everyone else sees me that way why would it matter.

I'm at a good point in my life. I have goals! I'm excited for life and I'm not going to let anything or anyone bring me down. And that is the reason I have to de-dramatize my life. I need to go to my zen place and find peace. It's amazing that as I wrote this I wasn't angry or mad I just wanted to vent these thoughts. I can't control others, I've tried and I failed, but I choose who I am. And I want to be someone who is charitable. Like I've been thinking lately. This life is short and if I can make it through this righteously then I'm going to be okay.