I love having a daughter but more so, I love having you as my daughter. You love dresses and bows. And ask to wear lipstick every day. You love playing barbies and with your dolls. You also like to get muddy and play hard. You are just as comfortable playing with dinosaurs. I find you playing outside in your prettiest dress digging in the dirt. And in the moment I think, ugh, that’s gonna stink to clean but I love this about you. I’m not sure if you will be out only daughter, but if you are, you are everything I wanted in a little girl.
You have big emotions. Sometimes bigger than I like.
I worry every time I send you to school. Is it safe there? Are you strong enough. As I mentioned your emotions are big and what if your teacher doesn’t understand. You are so sensitive. You are not always strong. I worry so much. I remind myself, you are still so little with so much to learn.
Madelynn, I love your heart. Another mom at school sent this letter to me about you, “Hi, I see you are Madelynn's mom! I'm Eliza's mom. They are in Mrs. Amanda's class together. I was scrolling through Facebook and I saw you commented on Amanda's wall and I knew I needed to message you after finding you. Amanda sent me a picture of our girls in class the other day. She said Madelynn was such a great helper with Eliza, even without asking. Eliza has autism and is nonverbal. She isn't too big on interacting with anyone, but I've seen on several papers that during free time that Eliza and Madelynn played together. It warms my heart so much. Eliza has a big attachment to Amanda. They are trying to teach her to use her peers for help too, so they paired Eliza with Madelynn to hold her hand and help her walk down the hall since they have bonded. And that is HUGE for Eliza. Sorry I'm writing a novel, but I just wanted to let you know how much your sweet girl is helping my girl and she probably doesn't know it. It honestly brings tears to my eyes just thinking about it.” Madelynn I cried when I read this. You’ll meet lots of people similar to you and even more who are different. Always be kind! Love everyone you meet. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it a hundred more times, you don’t have to be best friends with everyone but you do have to be kind.
You will never, ever get in trouble for being kind. I will never be upset with you for loving another, no matter who they are.
I want to safeguard you from all the bad in the world. I even have/am considering homeschooling just so I don’t have to send you out to the mean world. And when I do send you to school I want to stay all day and hold your hand. I want to make sure your teachers are loving you the way you need them to. I want to keep you safe. But I know in order for you to learn I can’t always hold your hand through life. I have to let you learn things for yourself. That’s really hard for a mom!
But I don’t want you to fear life! Most people are good though I’m constantly warning you about the bad. Most people just want to be loved. And I know you know how to love because you have loved me through all my imperfections. I know what it is to be changed by you, to have my insides reconfigure because of your kindness. Because of you, I’m a better person, a better mom.
I’m so proud of who you are and who you are becoming. Continue to learn. Continue to strong. Continue to be kind. There will be many mountains placed in front of you but o know you can do all things with the help of our Savior.
Current best friends are: Izzy Dilgard, sister Sulcer, AnnaJ Jackson, and Carlie Dowdy. Favorite color is: pink and purple
Favorite food: chips and cheese
Favorite song: let it go
Favorite activity: dance, soccer, and playing downstairs
Favorite movie: any Barbie movie
When you grow up you want to me a: Mommy/Doctor
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