My favorite Candice Post

I was just rereading my favorite post from Candice's blog and with her permission I decided to share part of it with you. Most of you are all married so you may or may not remember feeling this way but I always enjoy this post.
Dating causes emotional trauma to those that dare take the risk, and too much dating and disappointment can lead to confusion, anxiety, and loneliness.For some reason we tend to confuse our dating status with our worth as human beings. That's the one thing everyone wants to know about when you're single. And for some reason your life is supposed to start when you get married, but does that mean that I've just been living an imaginary or unfulfilled life these past 27 years? Not that it should be that way, but everyone around us tells us it is. People feel sorry for us single people when we are not dating and are happy and proud when we are dating. As if being single is a disability that we consciously choose for ourselves. Questions like "why aren't you dating anyone?" lead me to believe that dating is a simple choice we make like choosing to wear shoes and that if you aren't then something must be wrong with you. But as we all know, dating is not as simple as choosing a pair of shoes, because shoes don't have a mind of their own. Furthermore, if you do date someone or are in the process of dating someone, you are offered advice, both solicited and unsolicited, as to how to make it work. And when it doesn't work out despite your best effort even when you have liked it to, does that mean you did something wrong? Does that mean you aren't "good enough"? Does that mean that there is something inherently wrong with you? But really it just means that we haven't met the right person, right? But wait I thought that there is no "right" person! And if there were a right person, why would we need advice on what to do and say this right person to facilitate a relationship? We are taught that we are not to be alone, that we need companionship. And to a degree, we feel that innately. But what happens, when no one wants your companionship, does that make you unlovable? And I'm not even talking about marriage here, I'm just talking about dating! If we step outside the LDS world of focus on marriage, the rest of the world is still focused on relationships and companionship, even if it doesn't lead to marriage. For example, I went to a Christmas party for Law and Order cast and crew on Saturday night. It seemed as if everyone brought a date, everyone! I guess I'm so used to going to parties with all single people, I was surprised by how lonely I felt at that party.I can also look at it from the angle of being in a relationship where you are the one that isn't into the other person. And it's not like I feel that there is something wrong with him or that he's not good enough, but just that I don't feel like there is enough of a connection. But I don't pretend like there is a connection and then just stop calling or talking to him. And herein lies the difference between men and women. When I break off a dating relationship, no matter how far into it we have gotten, I always make sure that it's a clean break and that I am honest about my feelings. But there have been many times where I have been left unsatisfied with the ending a relationship when the guy doesn't make a point to extend that courtesy. So when he just stops calling, you are left wondering and waiting and ultimately disappointed and feeling as though you are at fault, even though he is the jackass.And what if anything are we supposed to learn from all this dating? All these different guys? I already know what I want and what I'm willing to live with or without. So what now? Just wait for the "right guy" to come along? Or should I be actively looking for the "right guy"? Have I grown from any of these dating experiences this year or have I just become more confused?So with all this confusion, the conflicting messages from society at large and the LDS community, the inability to understand the male species and the general lack of meaningful connections between the sexes, its no wonder that the plight of the single lady is so utterly ridiculous! So if anyone has thoughts or opinions or answers to these unending questions, I welcome all comments. I obviously have no answers!With that said, it's plain to see my frustration with dating.